Top 10 Things I've Learned About Wrestling

I've learned a lot about wrestling this season. Since I'm past the age of being able to truthfully say "I learn something new every day," I'm pretty excited. So here is what I've learned...

1. Bleachers are really uncomfortable, no matter how much padding your butt has. The maximum uncomfortable point comes at around the sixth hour of sitting on them.

2. Ignore the signs that say "No Coolers or Outside Food Allowed."

3. The "Real" wrestling parents have, at minimum, 300 mm lenses for their Canon cameras.

4. The command "Shoot!" has nothing to do with guns, although I believe most of the mothers watching their son's matches wish that it did (if for no other reason than to shorten the duration of #1 above.)

5. Yelling, "You can do it!" only reveals your stupidity about the sport, however "Head UP!" is usually a pretty safe thing to yell, no matter what position your son is in.

6. Remember Gumby? He couldn't do half of the things these kids do with their limbs!

7. Never, under any circumstances, make any comment about an opposing player to anyone sitting close to you. Murphy's Law dictates that person will be the kid's parent. (Fortunately, I didn't do this but had the interesting experience of hearing the comments about MY kid! I had to turn the self-control knob all the way up!)

8. Wrestling attire are not called "tights." They're called "singlets." What would a "doublet" be?

9. "Cradling" your opponent, unlike cradling your baby, is not a loving gesture, and

10. Essentially, the entire point of wrestling is to stay OFF the bottom which, unfortunately, is where David has spent most of the season. Until yesterday. Yesterday David pinned (yes, I said PINNED) his Urbandale opponent at the Valley tournament. This mom was pumped!